Man

No more blog

After a solid effort blogging I realized that I have run out of things to write about, so with some sadness and a lot of relief, this will be my last post. My only goal for this last post is that I end it on a positive note, like how Damon and Carlton ended LOST.

I can honestly look back with great pride on everything I’ve accomplished since launching this site back in the day, or a few days ago. I have the fondest memories I will probably forget.

There has been a lot of learning about myself, about commitment, about goal keeping. Just don’t label me a quitter. If you do, you don’t understand me. I’m stopping this because I now have a life. I didn’t when I published my first post.

But today, I have big plans with really exciting new projects that are so big and so exciting and new that I won’t have time to type because I’ll be doing other important things like talking and collaborating and faxing.

For those of you who are curious about my future plans, I’ll be straight up with you. I’m mucho interested in pursuing some kind of brain-stimulating hobby like Sudoku or trying to start an export-import thing.

Actually, the Sudoku line is a joke. That highly addictive game is so 2003. And I’m really bad at it, anyway. I was good at the one in the Sacramento Bee which would get progressively more difficult throughout the week, but the one in the back of the magazine on United flights is the one that knocked me down cold. I could never finish the problems in their Easy section. You might as well forget about filling in only two numbers in the medium-difficulty section. That made me feel terrible. Alone.

Scared.

That’s why I now call it Noduku, as in NO-Sudoku, as in ME-NO-Sudoku, and I try really hard to stay away from it. (I don’t really call it Noduku – just made that up – but someone trying to stop playing should call it that.)

[Side note: in protest, I no longer fly United.]

I’m done with blogging because blogging has become so passé. Blogging is so 2004 – 2009. Facebook and Instagram wrapped that platform up fast with their verticals and pivots and other startup lingo activities.

Turns out all anyone wants to do in 2013 is share pictures. No one wants to read about the completely boring aspects of anyone’s life – even mine. See! I’ve learned so much. Yes, exactly, it’s the journey, not the destination.

My gut tells me that blogging about the boring aspects of life probably won’t come back for at least three more years, like when Web 4.0 comes out. I think 4.0 is when the Internet is a hologram. I think.

“If you plan to fail, you fail to plan.” –Josh Rolph

Had to squeeze that one in there before I end the blog.

Let me give you the quick run down on blogging from all I’ve learned. This class is called Blogging 102: What might be incredibly exciting for you might be torture for me. Blogs about nothing are dead. Gone, over, done, dead. Seinfeld ended in the 90’s, you know.

One more thing on Jerry Seinfeld: have you noticed he doesn’t do nothing anymore? Now he does cars and coffee. That’s another reason why I can’t keep up with the blog. I’m not going to waste my life away writing nothing to no one. It’s not the way to live. If Seinfeld can’t do it, why do I think I can?

I just went to the kitchen to get a napkin. I came back with a kleenex. How do I eat this popcorn and type without a napkin? Fake butter everywhere…hard to clean up with a tissue. This is not right.

On that note, why can’t Orville Redenbacherorville make a microwave popcorn bag that can open more easily? Didn’t he invent the business?

I’m kicking myself for eating microwave popcorn when I know better. What was I thinking when I bought it the other night? I thought I had abandoned it altogether since I read that microwave popcorn butter can cause Alzheimer’s.

the-end

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6 thoughts on “No more blog

  1. Benny says:

    I hope you quit this idea. Or at least find a way to give the world what it needs… More Josh. In addition to love sweet love of course. Because words from you my friend are one thing there is just too little of.

  2. I didn’t know about your blog until today. I’m sifting through the plethora of posts. I love reading about nothing! Nothing is more important to me than something others consider important! I like your style. Bring blogging back.

    • joshua says:

      Thanks for signing up! You’re great. I like your site, too. How did I not know about that? Haven’t we been friends for decades?

  3. Melissa says:

    What?? Leaving so soon? I just got here. Even though I hope it’s not true, the farewell itself is really funny.

  4. Pingback: No more blog part 2 and the calculator watch | Josh Rolph

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